Hello dear Readers!
This is Teddy. I would like to show you where I am right now, but I haven’t a proper camera. So I perused the internet for you.
I’m in a field of wildflowers behind my school leaning up against the side of a windblown tree. Of course, my tree is a Eucalyptus and not a Wild Oak as in the picture. But we make do with what we have. Have you ever smelled a eucalyptus? It has a sweet, clean smell that permeates the air. That, combined with the perfume of a hundred wildflowers makes it a marvelous spot. The sun is shining and it’s quite warm as long as you stay out of the shadows. I particularly like the fact that it’s hidden and no one can see me. You see, my school is beautiful, but it’s kind of like a castle up on a hill.
So, occasionally, I like to escape from people for a while and rest outside. One thing I’ve noticed about we POTS patients is that we stay inside a great deal. There is nothing wrong with that, to go outside when you’re feeling ill seems like a great bother. Especially when you feel dizzy and the temperature isn’t comfortable. But, every time I do manage to rest outside, whether by doing homework or reading, it always makes my day. Plus, the doctors are always harping at Pie and I that our vitamin D count is low. So that is an added benefit. So, if you feel up to it, go outside a little while! It’s spring time, and beautiful. It renews your hope in life like nothing else does.
But that isn’t really my point of this post. You see, my family cares about me very much. So much so, that they subject themselves to boring medical journals to read about POTS so that Pie and I can get better faster. Well, several case studies have come up recently about how they’ve been using pressure stockings on their patients with some success.
See where this is going yet?
Heck, I didn’t even know what anti-embolism (thats their real name) stockings were until recently. I mean, I knew old people (my apologies to any ancients reading this) wear unfashionable high socks, but I didn’t know WHY. It’s to make sure the blood doesn’t pool, which is POTS jargon for blood not being able to fight gravity and go up from your feet to your head. If you don’t understand it’s just as well. Because it means you probably don’t have to deal with it on a regular basis. I’m very jealous.
Yup. Aren’t they gorgeous? It’s what every 18 year old girl dreams of. Pie doesn’t have to wear them either, which she has been gloating about…. She calls them my old man socks. Her circulation is better than mine so…. ugh. The worst part is that I can’t wear dresses much anymore. Which is a travesty. I love dresses. I would wear a sundress every day if I could. So, I have a master plan.
Rainbow socks! You see, white socks are kindof… unattractive. So, I’m going on a magical adventure to seek out colorful high socks. If I cover up the anti-embolism socks with these beauties and my converse, it will have some semblance of fashion (not that I care much, but I dislike truly ugly clothes)
So thats my plan. As of now I am just wearing jeans constantly. I don’t mind it, it’s just a bit of a hassle. Oh my gosh, the first time I tried to put on these stockings it took me a half an hour. I kid you not. They are that tight. Luckily, I have stretched them out enough so it only takes a few minutes of hopping and pulling. But I can’t wait until I get these knee high colorful socks so I can stop working out in pants. Some friends volunteered to take me thrifting with them today, I have great hope! I’m also considering tie-dying them, but Pie says I have too many tie-dyed things already : ) Pshhaw, you can never have too much tie-dye!
Sometimes integrating health routines into daily life can be troublesome, especially for teenagers. At some point, you realize that there is no need to be self-conscious. No one is watching, at least not much. Most people don’t realize that I have anything wrong with me until I do something odd, like go a quarter of a mile around something on campus just to avoid stairs. It’s an interesting part of college life to realize that everyone has problems. Living in such close contact with strangers is a rather unique experience. I’ve met so many people with worse health problems than my own, people that appear perfectly healthy! I know girls in my dorm with epilepsy, in remission from cancer, and friends with severe diabetes. I didn’t go out of my way to find kids with health problems, it was just a part of their lives that I didn’t know about until I got to know them better. Basically, it’s ok to stand out. Being normal isn’t all that great. I know we wish for it pretty often, because it seems so much easier. Easier than what we have to deal with now at any rate.
When I was younger, I used to wish that something would happen to me. I wanted to be like a heroine in a book, off traversing the world or be on a grand adventure. It happened, but not the way I thought it would. I never expected to become sick. It was a type of rude awakening that trials aren’t always romantic or poetic. The trials are specific to you, and your life. Everyone is dealing with something, even if they do not appear to be. My basic message is, don’t drown yourself in self pity. I won’t tell you the age old cliche that “you could have it so much worse” because you already know that. You know that there are people starving in Africa, and people in Japan with broken hearts. That doesn’t make it easier to deal with what you have to every day. You have to be stronger than you are, and kind enough to allow yourself to feel a little joy.
Speaking of joy, do you remember those Sim 3 legacy blogs I enjoy so much? I found a new one, a hilarious one. I physically crack up while reading it, Pie can attest. She thought I was going nuts over break “Oh, it’s Teddy. Laughing at her computer screen again.” Anyways, It’s called “The Southern Prettacy” by missmiserie. She is so funny, I never knew what a caricature of a red neck was like until I read her blog. It sounds terribly stereotypical, but it’s really making fun of the shenanigans people get up to in their own homes.
Also, something cute for you today: Marcel the Shell With Shoes On. It’s a youtube video that my brother hates and I love, it’s so quotable! Pie and I keep texting quotes back and forth.
“Want to know what I do for adventure? I hang glide on a dorito.”
It’s adorable. Watch it. It will make your day, guaranteed.